Sometimes people ask me: Danilo, what do you do?
And it's kinda hard to explain.
You know, up to some years ago I would have answered with my job titles, as they evolved through the years.
Project Engineer.
Project Manager.
Construction Manager.
Works Director.
Project Management Officer.
IT Project Management Consultant.
Project Management Trainer.
Scrum Trainer...
But... today?
Well, I have conversations with people, they get insights, and their life changes forever.
Let me explain.
———
Brenda's Story
I had a client, an energy therapist, who didn't want to show up in front of a camera.
She was ok getting on a phone call, but did not accept the way she looked.
She wasn't accepting herself.
I invited her on our first coaching call, and I told her it would be a video call.
I told her she was welcome to join with her video on, but she didn't have to if she didn't want to. It was ok for me that she could at least see me, so we could keep our connection levels high.
And the time for the video call came.
And she showed up.
With her video on.
And we talked.
No more than a week later she was invited to present in a Facebook Live by a colleague of her.
In front of 120 people.
And she showed up, in all of her elegant and rooted presence.
And she conquered the audience.
And a large number of those people became instantly her clients, and she filled up her calendar with appointments for the next 4 weeks while more than doubling the number of appointments per week.
And all clients wanted to pay immediately to book their spot, even if it was with weeks in advance.
Two weeks later, second Facebook Live with the same colleague, same elegance, same presence.
Same audience (with newcomers).
One additional month of appointments on her calendar later that night.
She told me afterwards that she had never experienced anything like that.
And she was brightening as a lightbulb as she said that.
Was it because of "my" coaching? Nope.
We just talked.
I just pointed her in the right direction.
She accepted the challenge against the voices in her head.
And she won.
And she was still herSelf, just a bit more.
———
Robert's Story
I had another client who started our coaching journey to overcome his constant feeling of overwhelm.
Top performer, he just couldn’t say “no”.
He accepted all what was put on his plate, being it at work and in his private life.
He had to demonstrate he was able to manage it all.
Yet, he was stretched thin, and felt inadequate and guilty of not being able to do the impossible. Filled with “busyness” and all “top priority“ tasks, he felt he was falling short both in office and with his wife and daughter.
One hour deep into our first conversation, as he was telling me the story of his early years, he struck a chord. His father was preferring his sister over him, no matter what. What he did was never enough. And he promised himself he would make his father proud, doing so much and hard work, that he would finally be noticed by him.
As I pointed that out, mirroring what he had just said, he stared at me speechless and his eyes became wet.
Sad to say, this top performer had lost his father years before.
Without that short conversation, he would have gone that way all his life long with no answer to his behaviors and no satisfaction after his struggles.
The person who should have “noticed” him was no more there.
And so I guided and coached him on a path on using in his personal and professional life Scrum, the agile framework adopted by high performing teams that create products in environments where internal and external conditions are expected to constantly change.
Just like in our lives.
In no time he was able to set priorities and negotiate expectations, while performing at his very best yet with a heap of pressure off his shoulders, and in the meantime enjoying happy moments with his family with no guilt.
Fulfilled, finally in the flow.
———
Patrick's Story
Another client started his coaching journey as a Scrum Master. He was determined to be of service to his Scrum Team, yet he had difficulties with writing letters, words, numbers, and with foreign languages, and often he became aggressive for realizing he was not able to convey to people the messages he wanted to. Such difficulty had a name - dyslexia and dyscalculia - and as many different ways to shape itself as the number of people on earth.
It was not diagnosed as such when he was a child, since at that time there was not enough knowledge on the matter.
And so, throughout his life, he tried to cope with it while still knowing inside that what normally worked for other people who wanted to learn didn’t work for him, and for all of his life he tried to cover it somehow.
I had had no direct nor indirect experience with it in my life, but I was resolved to do all what I could to support him on that journey.
I studied all what I could on the subject and directed him to a resource that explained how it was just a different type of intelligence, and how to use its “gifts“ in a positive way.
In fact, dyslexic people have an overall vision that “normal” people often miss.
Disney, Leonardo Da Vinci, Michelangelo, Beethoven, Richard Branson, Einstein - all visionary people gifted with dyslexia.
With this enlightening insight, and within the safe, respectful, and healthy space we co-created in our coaching practice, he was able to regain confidence.
He learned to ask for help, to put his Scrum Team Members in the center of the experience by keeping an eye on the health of the team’s dynamics, and to let them do the practical tasks without any unworthy feeling on himself.
His aggressive ways became just a distant memory, his performance and effectiveness skyrocketed, and he was even able to pass the Professional Scrum Master Certification (PSM I), known as the most complex of its kind, and in a foreign language for him, with an astounding 96.3% score!
In the meanwhile he has been able to support not just one, but two Scrum Teams at the same time, and has never been so alive and confident as today.
———
And so, what do I do?
I help powerful people remember how powerful they are.
Or, as I like to say, I help divine people remember how divine they are.
I shed some light on that inner wisdom within you that knows what to do.
That has always known what to do.
And that is there for you to show up if you just allow it to.
Nothing to add, just some coating to remove to let the diamond within you to shine again.
Just yourSelf, a bit more.
———
And now here’s to you.
How would that shining inner light transform your life?
How would you make use of a coaching conversation like the ones above to break through your next level?
What impact would you have?
What would you make out of it?
If that resonates with you and makes you sparkle, please let me know by leaving a message here below, or a private one from the home page.
Love,
Danilo
PS: This post is widely inspired by a blog post with a similar title by Rich Litvin, one of the Master Coaches that I follow and admire the most. Thanks to my Coaching Mastermind colleagues Louis Martinez and Sana Keshtkaran, Louis for pointing me to that post, Sana for making me learn the power of silence and pauses, also in writing ;)
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